I loved the holidays. I especially loved having my husband home for two weeks! But I’m glad to be getting back to normal in my eating and in my schedule.

This is a rhythm I know. Time to dance!

I’m setting a weight goal for this week to help keep me motivated. I’m not going to let myself get down if I don’t reach it, but I’m going to try my darnedest to get there.

That weight is 228. 

This week is mine. Bring it!

GPOY today is brought to you by the number 19 and the letter P (for Pro, which is what my husband has been calling me all week!).

I’ve been in a really great mood the past few days. I’ve gotten so many things done, I’m even surprised at myself. I’ve been getting my water in every day, eating less than 1500 calories every day (except yesterday. Yesterday I required some chocolate therapy that pushed me to 1700), and this morning I went for a beautiful fall walk. Stars melting into a pink and blue sky, the perfect breeze—it was lovely.

As long as my little man is feeling all right today (I believe he’s sprouting some late molars, and he’s been in an awful state. I hate when my babies are in pain, I feel so bad for him. :-(), my husband and are I going out to lunch thanks to a Groupon from a friend of ours.

Hope you all are having equally happy, productive days! <3

Just got back from a lovely walk. Wish my phone had a better camera—it’s a beautiful day out there. I am SO GLAD the hot weather is moving out! 

I also weighed in this morning. I’ve been avoiding the scale for 2 or 3 weeks. I knew I was doing terribly, and I didn’t want to know how terribly. That’s a problem, though, because if I don’t face the reality, I can’t fix it.

Today I weighed 231 pounds. That’s 4 pounds more than I’ve been maintaining all summer, and 7 pounds more than my lowest weight since I started last year.

It’s not where I want to be, but it is where I’m starting again, and that’s okay.

So:

Original starting weight (2/2011): 309 pounds

Current weight/new starting weight (9/2012): 231 pounds

Short term goal: 209 pounds (100 pounds lost)

Long term goal: 159 (150 pounds lost)

Since the age of 16, I’ve never seen a weight lower than 220. I’m ready for that 209. I want it. 

And all I have to do is go take it. :-D

Remember how I said it’s the beginning again? That makes today Day 1. So far, it’s been a good day.

I followed up the good breakfast with an equally good lunch: a couple of turkey and baby spinach sandwiches on whole wheat. I just had frozen broccoli sauteed with garlic, chili powder, and a little bit of ranch dressing for snack.

Now I’m sipping my way through a bottle of seltzer water, cranking up to that 100oz a day I promised. After dinner, I’m going for a 30 minute walk. (Uphill, both ways! :-P)

Total calories so far: 750. Plenty of room for our chicken chili for dinner!

I’ve let myself get really slack. Really.

I let myself get distracted by a lot of other things, and let my weight loss stay to the side. I haven’t gained any weight, but I haven’t lost any, either. Not in a long time.

And I’m tired of that. I don’t want to be afraid of the scale like I was when I was over 300 pounds.

So this is the beginning again. I’m going by the goals I laid out a few weeks ago, but I’m erasing expectations. I’m going to stop expecting myself to be the same person I was 6 months ago. It’s no more fair to do that than it is to think I’m the same person I was over a year ago when I weighed in for the first time.

There is only today, and today, it’s the beginning again.

It starts with breakfast. 

(Whole wheat bagel with 2 egg whites, spinach, and diced tomatoes, if you’re wondering. :-D)

Running and walking are important for both my physical and mental well being.

I was reminded again last night.

Also, the lightning on the way home was incredibly awesome. I felt like I was walking through some movie.

And I burned 400 calories, to boot. 

This is what finishing a 100 mile run looks like.

At the Nanny Goat Run, the “unlikely runner” Tony “Endorphin Dude” Nguyen pushed through to 88 miles, making the 86-mile in 24-hour cut off.

He came back and walked off with his 100 mile sticker at Run de Vous yesterday. 30 hours.

Wimping out of my 2-mile run seems really silly right about now.

Congratulations, Endorphin Dude—thanks for the inspiration!

Because the old goals are outdated and I’ve been letting it slide.

The fact is, I’ve lost a lot of weight; I weigh 85 pounds less today than last summer. Also, it’s been a busy and hot summer, and I haven’t worked out nearly as often as I did over the winter. 

My caloric needs have changed, but I have been acting like they haven’t.

It’s been a big game of self-sabotage, where I eat too many calories while convincing myself I’m not, and then get frustrated when the scale doesn’t move and give myself permission to not care.

And that—well, that is not No Quit House Style. And it has to stop.

So, having re-calculated how many calories I should be eating to lose two pounds a week based on my current weight and activity level, here are my new goals:

• Eat between 1350-1500 calories per day.
• Workout no less than 3 days a week for 30+ minutes each time.
• Drink 110 oz of water every day.
• Don’t eat after 9 p.m. or between the hours of 4 and 5 p.m. (these are the hours when I boredom snack).
• Be accountable every day. Record calories and fitness every day.

I have not come this far to quit. It’s time to get this done.

My husband at his 5k this morning: Run for the Fallen