THANK YOU all of you who sent me messages of encouragement today! You don’t know how many times I came back and read through them again. Talk about motivation and encouragement! <3
Three things I learned today:
1. I have more hoarding tendencies than I realized. I found things I had held onto for bizarre reasons tied to feelings of failure that would take a long time to explain.
I threw them all out—some went easily, some took rushing through it like tearing off a band-aid. I’m satisfied, though. I don’t miss anything I threw away.
2. I make things way worse off in my head than they actually are. I’m sure I will run into things in this house that are just as bad as I think they are, but I think I’ll run into even more things that aren’t.
Under the bathroom sink was difficult, but it wasn’t because the mess was bad, it was because facing it made me deal with feelings of failure, and once it was clean, those feelings were gone.
3. My husband is the best support I could ask for. He doesn’t make me feel bad or guilty for the mess. He doesn’t make me feel silly for the process I have to go through to do this. He prayed for me and encouraged me all day long, and even washed the mirrors while he was home for lunch. :-D
This next step is a doozy for me. Runenvy encouraged me to take pictures, and I did. And I’m going to share them here. It scares me, it shames me to admit how much things have gone downhill around here. I’ve done a very good job (mostly) of hiding the worst of it.
But my pastor said one time that anything you feel compelled to hide has power over you, and I refuse to let it.
Under the sink:
Under the sink: